Some thoughts

My new apartment still doesn't feel like home. I realized just recently that although I've unpacked everything, and started going to school and making friends in the complex, I still unconciously feel that this is just temporary. Its like I think I'm only going to be here a couple weeks, and then I'll move back to the dorms or something. I was sitting at the table just now struggling to grasp the concept that I live here now, that I'm going to spend the next 8 months walking up to campus and back from this apartment. That I've got a new set of roommates now, and I'm not going to be living with my old ones anymore.

I love mint chocolate chip ice cream.

It got to 8 o clock tonight, and I thought, maybe I'll go to sleep early tonight, I don't really have anything else planned. So now its 1:30, and I'm still awake. I've never been much good at going to bed early. It always takes me longer than it should to actually get to bed. Some nights it seems that every time I look at the clock, another hour has gone by, and I'm still awake. I don't even know what it is that I do that keeps me awake for so long.

My cursor isn't blinking. Is that a problem? I may have to speak to the person who was recently snooping around on my computer... "not changing anything." My control panel looks different too. But that one I can fix. Oh look, my cursor came back. This is rather odd.

I'm not a very brave or adventurous person in social situations. Which is funny, because I have no problem talking to people, or asking directions and information. Yet I often find I have a hard time just relaxing enough to be myself, even around friends. And if you've ever spent much time with me, you'll know I can be horribly indecisive. Some of the time, I really can't make a decision, but there's also a lot of the time where I could make a decision, but I don't want to for fear my preferences will be at odds with other peoples.

Sometimes I wonder what other people think of me. Of what importance am I to anyone else? Right now, though, I am going to sleep.